snack: twenty guacamoles on mission tortilla chips
drink: negra modelo / tecate
i'm not usually one to celebrate cinco de mayo, but this year, oh man did i guac shit up. last wednesday, nachosny (nyc's preeminent authority on nachos) held their 2nd annual "guactacular" at brooklyn's bell house & after missing it last year, i planned ahead this year & luckily got a ticket before it sold out. i know what you're thinking: "what the hell's a guactacular?" well maynard, it's pretty simple: a guactacular is an event where twenty folks compete for the title of "best guacamole." also, it's an opportunity to drink cheap mexican beer & watch hip brooklynites interact.
i arrived just before 7pm, hoping to take full advantage of the first hour of the event, which held the promise of FREE mexican beer. wouldn't you know it, i wasn't the only one who had that idea & when the start of the event was delayed by ten minutes, the hefty crowd that had formed outside the doors started to get a bit restless. by the time the doors opened around quarter past, much of that crowd (myself included) made a beeline for the bar & grabbed a free negra modelo before getting in line for the guacamole tasting. grabbing a beer first turned out to be a smart idea (although getting two might have been a smarter idea), as there were just under 400 people in attendance, meaning that the lines weren't exactly fast-moving.
basically, there were tables with the twenty guac competitors set up in a semi circle & the crowd was divided up into two lines that started at the center of the tables & branched out. this meant that you'd get into one line, work your way down the tables sampling half of the guacs & then get into the other line & sample the other ten. if i was an impatient punk, it would've bothered me, but i'm not, so it didn't. instead, i waited in line in front of two women who could best be described as "cougars," drank my beer, people watched, followed the screen behind the competitors (which contained tweets tagged with "guactacular") & listened to grammy nominated accordion player alex meixner play cinco de mayo-themed polka music on the stage behind the competitors.
by the time i reached the tables, i had finished my negra modelo & was so ready to guac. the first guac was a "california" guac served by three girls from cali. while it was nothing mind-blowing, the girls were cute & friendly, so it was a good start. the next competitors had a strawberry guac with a pleasantly sweet aftertaste & after them was a dude from the skint, whose "johnny 5 guac" was a guac topped with spicy mayo & garnished with radishes, carrots, cilantro & coconut milk. i LOVED it & the judges did too, as it took 2nd place. according to my notes, the next two guacs, respectively, contained parmesan & cumin, but neither was all that memorable.
the next five guacs made up my favorite stretch of the event. first up was a tasty semi-sweet guac made with dried cherries, followed by an aight one containing peppers & tequila. after that, there was a respectable guac made with a bunch of stuff, including wasabi & worcestershire sauce. the final two on this side were a BLT guac made by the girl who took home the judges' prize last year & "tuguac shakur," a guac topped with ricotta cheese (& the soul of tupac) that the judges eventually awarded first prize. both were damn creative & damn tasty & with regard to tuguac shakur, that's saying a lot, because ricotta cheese usually makes me want to hurl.
before getting into the other line for the second half of the guacs, i headed back to the bar & grabbed a tecate which, although it wasn't free, was only $3...can't beat that. after a shorter wait (but one that was still long enough for me to finish my beer), i reached the tables & tried guac #11, which contained "stuff." to be honest, i don't remember what was in it at all. #12 was a so-so guac made with pickled pepper & sea salt, followed by one with mango in it. since i'm a sucker for anything with mango in it, i enjoyed this one immensely. guac #14 was made with peppercorn & while i enjoyed it, it wasn't my fave. that didn't stop me from accidentally declaring it "the champion" on twitter though. oops. #15...my notes say "parmesan," but i don't remember a damn thing about it.
then came my favorite guac of the evening--guac #16. why was it my favorite? not only did the dude who made it let me scoop the guac myself rather than serving it to me, but the guac had pieces of kiwi fruit in it & was called "a guac to remember." tasty and clever. the girl next to him was serving something she called "supersonic guac." she didn't disclose what it contained & my taste buds aren't refined enough to tell, so i'm not sure what was in it, but i liked it. it wasn't faster than the speed of sound though. some guy named "dr. t" came next, but his guac was creamy & not all that tasty, especially when compared to the one by the dude next to him, which contained saffron & was served to me after the dude did a sweet MJ-esque spin. the final guac of the eve was the "cumin at ya" guacamole, one made with sweet onion, red bell pepper, jalapenos & cumin. it was one of my favorite & ended up taking home both the people's choice award & third prize from the judges.
by the time i finished the 20th guac, i was pretty exhausted & guac-filled, so i got another $3 tecate & stuck around until just after the winners were announced. right before i left, the free tequila shots came out, a development that made my decision to leave quite difficult, but it's probably a good thing that i didn't stick around for them, as that likely would've led to me shedding my pants and/or shirt. nobody needs to see that. in all, i had a blast & from the looks of a photo gallery of the event on metromix, apparently a lot of others did too (once they stopped complaining about the long lines). good times fo sho, but to be honest, i think i'm all set with guac for a little bit.