#149 - only in dreams.

for years now, i've been waking up pretty much every morning with absolutely no recollection of my dreams from the previous evening. i'm pretty sure why this is, but we won't get into that right now in this fully public forum. reasons aside, science tells me that there are dreams going on up on that brain of mine whilst i snooze, but i'll be damned if i know what those dreams are about. on the random occasions when i wake up & actually do remember my dreams, i find myself cursing waking life & wanting to go right back to sleep, with the hope that i'll pick right up where i left off. that never happens though...stupid dreams & their lack of continuity.

over the past week something's changed though. i've been waking up almost every morning with actual memories of the previous evening's dreams. quite frankly, it's been awesome, although it's made me want to spend more & more time sleeping. i've never been one to believe in dream analysis, but if i was, here's a sampling of what i'd have to work with:

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#148 - port traits: misc mix.

for the final part of my series on portland, oregon & portland-area snackage, i'm going to mix it up a bit & present you with TWENTY miscellaneous facts about the city. if they ever come out with a "portland edition" of trivial pursuit or you end up on some weird, very-specific portland-themed game show, you'll totally kick ass.

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#147 - port traits: between the bars.

ever since i turned 21, i've dreamed that one day i'd have a bar that i could call my own, a neighborhood place where i could stop in any day of the week at any time of the day & the bartender, a cute girl who i've established a flirty customer-proprietor relationship with would look at me as i grabbed a stool at the bar & say to me "the usual?" i'd nod & she'd pour me a cold pint of my favoritest snooty beer. it'd be some real cliche shizz & totally not pathetic. every once in a while, she & i & a handful of regulars would order food from the restaurant next door. it'd be like a second home, third if you count my childhood home, which i probably should. to this day, largely due to my propensity towards home drinking, i've yet to find that magical third home...still searching though.

for part three of my portland, oregon investigative series, i've decided to take a look at the portland bar scene & see what it has to offer as far as third homes. i've yet to witness the portland scene firsthand but it's one that i've heard, read & dreamed a lot about & i have a handful of portland friends & acquaintances, so i was able to tap their alcohol-tainted brains & get a ROUGH idea of what's in store for me if i ever go out drinking in bridgetown. that's right...bridgetown. the city has a river running right through the middle of it, so they've got bridges. bridgetown. i'm not sure if anyone actually calls it that, but if they don't, they should. as a nickname, "city of roses" is just stupid. other suggestion: "beavertown."

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#146 - move on.

full disclosure: i ♥ brooklyn. other than my childhood home in nh, i've lived here longer than in any other locale & although there's a good chance that i won't eventually settle down here, for now it's become what i refer to as my "home." since moving here almost a decade ago, i've lived in three different places & with each move, i've moved closer to manhattan. this past weekend, after a three-year run in my park slopish apartment, i reversed that trend & moved way south into a new place in dyker heights, a hood that many brooklynites would likely have difficulty pinpointing on a map.

sunday was moving day & for once, i was actually packed & ready to go a day ahead of time. the day started quite early, when my bro & i woke up at the ass-crack of dawn (7am) to make a 9am pickup time for a pickup truck he'd rented through zipcar. if there’s one thing i can say about choosing a vehicle for your move, it’s that if you choose to go the u-haul route, you’re a sucker. every single time i’ve rented from them, some sort of debacle has ensued--flat tires, u-haul locations that decided to close early on my moving day, missing hand carts, etc. this time, largely thanks to my bro's assistance, everything went absolutely swimmingly & by the early afternoon, i was already back at the new apartment & getting settled. best. move. ever.

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#145 - port traits - hey jerky!

in the first part of our four-part series on portland, oregon, i spoke to a bunch of reasons why i envision it as such a dreamy city, but i'm not kidding myself. i know just like with every other city in the world, it's no utopia. last year, business week rated it "america's unhappiest city." in fact, there’s a whole blog devoted to things about portland that suck..."wannabe suicide girls," street kids with pets/the people in pioneer square, panda express. according to the blog that is apparently the authority on all things sucky in portland, these are all things that suck about portland.

in addition, in portland's 150 years of existence it's definitely been home to a handful of jerks, folks who deserve a good caning or something. the most infamous resident from the last few decades is america's favorite kneecap-breaking figure skater, tonya harding, who was born there. same for nike's phil knight, whose company is the king of the sneaker industry & the king of labor abuses. rocker hag courtney love is a one-time oregonian & portland resident too, but don't even get me started on her.

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