#189 - time to get away.

back when i was in my mid-to-late twenties, i went to a handful of concerts every month. these days, not so much. in 2010, i think i went to four, maybe five shows & i haven't been to one yet this year. other than the usual financial reasons, it's mostly because at some point along the way i burnt out on constantly standing around for hours in packed clubs to see my favorite bands. lucky for me, technology now lets folks stream their concerts LIVE on the interwebz, allowing me to see bands whilst lounging on my couch in whatever stage of undress & inebriation i so desire.

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#188 - a bitter american in new york.

here's an often thought that lives in my head: "i friggin hate people." they just make me so steamin' sparkin' mad sometimes! y'know where people really suck?...like where they LOVE to congregate? the subway system. that's where. i know. everybody's got their special "the subway sucks" bitch stories. between work & play, i ride the subway at least twenty times every week, so i've got mine too. my main beef is that some people have ZERO grasp on how to act when in the presence of other human beings. it's about courtesy, people. last thursday, i totally threw a bitter shoulder into this one guy who tried to rush past me onto the train as i was exiting it. as i walked across the platform to catch the express train, i looked back to see him giving me the evil eye from inside his departing local train.

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#187 - new-fangled comedy.

excuse me sir! excuse me! do you like comedy? ok, good. well, i don't have any cheap tickets to a stand-up comedy act for you, but i do have a lil' comedic recommendation for yo ass. check this out: remember how you used to go out on fridays & hang out with other humans? yeah, well...scrap that. from now until the last friday in march, you should probably stay in on fridays...strictly for comedic reasons.

here's why...

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#186 - OMG!

OMG! do you guyz know what today is?!!! OMG OMG OMG! of course you know what today is! how could you not? SHRIIIEEEEEEEEEEEK!!!! today is the seventeenth anniversary of the day when one pattie mallette squeezed the blessed beiber baby out of her vajayjay & into our universe!!! OMG JUSTIN BIEBER BDAY XVII!!! on the day he was born, slick willie clinton was in the white house & mariah carey's "without you" was the number one single. seventeen years later, the bieb's grown up to be a bonerfied canadian pop star/teen hearthrob/lesbian doppleganger. sure he's never had a number one single of his own, but he's been trying REALLY HARD to get one. i think it's because he doesn't have enough co-writers & producers. now that he's seventeen, he should demand no less than ten co-writers & ten producers on each & every one of his songs. if they don't meet his demands, he cuts his hair again.

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#185 - viva le revolution.

you know how i know what's newsworthy these days? i navigate my non-microsoft web browser (y'know, cause i'm edgy) over to cnn.com & i peruse the page to see if they've devoted a special section of their headlines to an event or a news phenomenon or whatnot. for a little while, gabrielle giffords got her own special section. then the egyptian revolution got its own special section. somewhere in between there, the tunisian revolution may have got its own special section but honestly, i wasn't paying attention at the time, so i can't confirm or deny the matter.

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